What am I doing here?

I was sitting in church on Sunday and getting very inspired to write.  I do that every Sunday and wish I could secretly open a laptop and write something during church.  So I take notes, however, now that it's Tuesday night, I've lost that inspiration and train of thought but I'm going to try to take myself back to Sunday.  Messy scribble notes, don't fail me now!

I've been blogging for a year now.  I wasn't in full force until around February of this year when I got my own domain.  I've gone down several trails regarding my blog:

My original goal to blog was to promote my Yahoo! articles - FAIL
I wanted to promote my Keepsakes by Jill business - FAIL
I've written about anything and anything. - FAIL (well, mostly)
I've tried useless facts and interesting stuff - Not too bad...

So I decided for a whole new blog re-vamp.  However, I still struggle with the fact that I only have a few followers and no one comments on my posts.  I thought if I promoted my blog more, get my name out there, more people would read it.  Then I hesitate at the same time.  Do I really want pictures of my family and things I do and say for the world to see and read?  My new purpose for my blog now is to write about Christian living and write devotions about everyday struggles in my life.  While I'm sitting in church, it dawned on me that if only one person read my blog, got inspired and told a friend, then I've done my job.  It's so hard sometimes to see other people scale up the success ladder and I feel I'm still down at the bottom rung.  Who am I inspiring?

Perhaps blogging isn't my calling....

Writing and blogging was only supposed to be a hobby.  Something to keep my brain from turning mush.  I tend to get a bit competitive with my own goals.  If I'm not being sought out for what I'm doing, I'm not good enough.  Then it dawned on me that I've been chosen to have the highest honor in the world.

I'm a mom...

I get to stay home and watch my kids grow up.  I get to be part of their lives, visit them at school, teach them how to live, be functional, play with them, laugh and love them.  What more could I ever ask for?  God has trusted me with two of His children, four stepkids, a daughter-in-law and a granddaughter.  That is the highest honor anyone could receive and I got it!  If  being entrusted with God's children isn't considered an award, then I don't know what is!