The Delete Key

The Delete Key - That little button not far from my right pinky, the one I use way too often.  How easy it is to use, backup, delete a mistake and try again.  Too often, I use the delete key to go back and correct a mistake all to make another mistake or the same one again.  If only life had a delete key....

"The entirety of your life is made up of two percentages.  Ten percent is what happens to you.  Ninety percent is how you react to what happens."

In many cases, we couldn't have done anything about a bad situation when it did happen, even if we wanted to.  The key to staying on a faith journey is to learn to forgive, forgiving the person who did you wrong, even forgiving yourself.  Now let this statement settle in your heart:

The Bible doesn't tell us to forgive ourselves.  

There's nowhere in the Bible scriptures that say we need to forgive ourselves.  Christ suffered a horrible death to give us forgiveness.  His work on earth was so complete that "I will forgive their wrongdoing and never again remember their sin."  Jeremiah 31:34.  God has pressed the delete key over our sins, every one of them, and He has chosen to never remember them again, or have the intention of punishing us for them.  So why should we? 

So how do you go about forgiving yourself or someone else who did you wrong?

1.)  Refuse to hold a grudge.  Choose to release that person (or yourself) of the liability, then trust God to work on your behalf and bring healing to your heart.  Forgiveness means releasing into His hands the person, the circumstance and the outcome. All of it.  That's the way He did it with us, right?

I relate to this step by being a mother.  My kids do me wrong often.  They don't listen, they say I'm mean when they don't get their way and I occasionally get a mean face.  But I choose to forgive them because I love them unconditionally.  No matter how good or bad they behave.  We are all God's children, just the same.

When someone makes me angry or does something wrong to me, I oftentimes go over and over (and over) in my head what I should've said or done.  I replay that situation over in my head like rehearsing a play to the point where it exhausts me in every aspect of my life.  That's the clue that I'm still holding a grudge.  When I can release a little bit of that anger at a time, it allows me to become more free of that situation, accepting the fact that there was nothing I could've done to avoid that situation or to make it better. When I allow God to take over and make it right for me, I can begin to forgive.

2.)  Leave room for God to act on your behalf.  It's natural to feel as though forgiveness lets the other person just get away with it.  You're still the victim and they're still the offender, especially if that person never expresses any regret or gives a lame attempt at an apology.  If either of these is the case, it's not your job to make sure they get what they deserve.  That's God's job, in His own timing, His own way.

3.) Pray.  Forgiveness is a miracle and miracles can take time.  So don't expect instant results, but pray for God to empower you to be patient and have the willingness to forgive.

Forgiveness is not always easy.  It's a process.  We're not perfect, we're human.  We make mistakes, others make mistakes.  These steps are by no means easy to do, but hopefully they will help release us from those situations we experience in life that hinder us to live with true freedom and love.

"Just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you must also forgive."  Colossians 3:13

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Inspired by The Resolution for Women by Priscilla Shirer